Naggar and Barot

So i mentioned this place called naggar the last time i wrote, wont really write abt it, but will definately post a few pics... hope you like em...

























last weekend i took a trip to barot... its a beautiful place in near mandi... the roads are scarily thrilling... space hardly enough fr one car to move!! i had fun anyways... for the people interested in visiting that place, there are no hotels out there!! dont worry, there are three guest houses and they offer quiet a comfortable stay... river uhl flows through this beautiful village... well if yu aren't a nature freak, yu wont find much to do there... and for the rest, yu can go crazy trekking and exploring the place... yu'd find a beautiful lil waterfall every two minutes... a lil bit exageration wont hurt eh?? :P
yu can go fishing abd catch awesome trout... who knows, yu might get the best catch... walk on the riverbed... or jus enjoy the beauty from your balcony... the music of the gushing waters soothes your senses... the river is full of huge boulders, yu can jus climb em n sit in the sun, or enjoy the rain all day long... believe me, its all worth the effort... peope are down to earth and always ready to help... for choosy eaters, not the place fr yu... jus one proper restaurant, n they don give yu a menu card, they simply tell wats there in the kitchen... suits me, they cook awesome food...
one lil advice fr all the alcoholics n smokers, the best yu get is whiskey n not so good brands... and smokes, jus four square and gold flake, so jus in case yu're as choosy as me here, carry your own stuff... wont be puttin up pics, phone fell in water... but yeah yu must go there once... plus yu get awesome veg momos wit awesome vegetable strew... yummy...
so on that node, i'd take off...
kudos...

Lived A New Life Today....

Like any other normal day at home, my day started at 12 noon. As usual, I had no plans for the day. I took a shower, got ready, had "breakfast"(well, my day just began, it was morning for me!!), and left home. I had no clue as to where I was going. Wasn't even feeling unusually spiritual or anything. And yet there was something different about the day. had this urge to feel happiness around me.

The rain created a beautifully comfortable ambiance. I found myself playing hide and seek with the world, disappearing in the thick mist time and again.

I caught a bus then and decided to go to my dad's office. It started raining heavily. there weren't many people in the bus, but all the seats were occupied. A very old man boarded the bus n like i usually do, i gave my seat to him. He smiled, and kept his hand on my head and blessed me. It felt really good. Gave me a deep satisfaction and a weird happiness. Felt awesome!!

I went and stood near the entrance of the bus. The door was open. The cold wind gently splashed raindrops on my face. I was listening to my favorite 'rainy day' songs when the conductor came to spoil the fun and asked me to close the door. felt like killing him there and then. But then the day was too beautiful n calm to perform that task. So i decided to forgive him and spare his life this time. :P

I got off at the bus stand and walked to the mall. I went into a bookstore and started to browse through books. was checking out Judi Picolt when all of a sudden my eyes fell upon a book that looked really familiar - The Kite Runner. I couldn't resist, I took out the book from the rack and started reading it. I have that book and I've read it a thousand times before, but going through known territories has its own charm.

I didn't realize, but I did that for over an hour when the salesperson got sick of me and chucked me out of the store!! Okay, not literally!! To compensate for the inconvenience I'd caused, i bought a magazine - Osho Times.

Started walking again with the earphones playing my favorite music. It didn't bother me that I didn't have any company. In a way, I was glad to be alone. Didn't make me lonely.

I stepped into CCD then and took a table rite next to the window. A cup of Irish coffee, something to read and a nice lonely corner at CCD - perfect reciepe for a perfect rainy day. Soft music in the background added to my experience. It reminded me of my school days when I used to go there whit a fren of mine to study, and we used to end up chatting about things that had no connection whatsoever with out text books n notes!!

I moved out then, and bought a box of chocolates for some reason... Just felt like doing that...( and that is where, my special someone, went the cash I had kept for the recharge!! Sorry!!) I started to walk towards The IIAS(Indian Institute of Advansed Studies)... And gave a chocolate to every kid i came across!! That is pretty unusual for me coz I'm am "known" for disliking kids!!

At the IIAS, there was a group of guys that commented when they saw me giving a chocolate to a kid. I went to them, looking really angry, I'm not the one that takes shit from anybody!! But don't know what made me do it, my frown turned into a kind smile, and I gave them a chocolte each!! they looked at me with their mouths wide open. I felt funny, strange funny, and happy.

Walked back to the mall then and went to an orphange near Lady Reading(hospital). Deposited rest of the chocolates there, requesting the authority to distribute them among the kids. To my surprize, the no. of chocolates left were exactly double the no. of kids in that institution. The gods wanted to be fair I guess. :)

I walked to my dad's office then and spent a good one hour with him. after which we left for home, picking my mom from the way. Everything felt good. i was happy, happy inside.

For a change, I lived a day, not just spent it.....

Moments.....

There are times when you laugh, there are times when you cry.....
Times when you wanna live forever, times you just wanna die.....
Days you wanna forget, days you wanna treasure.....


All these times, days, seconds, define significant 'moments' in your life.....


a moment can define your death or life.....
it doesnt take a year's planning to commit sucide, its jus about the moment, if yu give in, or you decide to save yourself.... ok thats quiet a depressing example!!


its strange the way one moment can change your life forever, isn't it??

the moment of truth for some, n a moment to treasure for others..... we cant really save the moment but strange are the ways to keep its memory alive..... and the effect it has on you!! A picture for instance, we go for a vacation with our loved ones, family, friends, that special someone, or even alone!!! and we keep pressing the button to save something that we can never possibly get back..... even then, when we look at those pictures, it brings back the memories, the emotions attached to that particular piece of paper!! we dont really gain anything out of it, and yet it gives some kinda happiness and even sadness sometimes.... you realize that once upon a time, you lived that moment.....

we keep telling everybody to live in the moment, forget the past, worry not about the future..... but do we actually follow what we preach?? dont know abt you, but even though i keep pretending to, i cant ever seem to get over anything, may be because i dont want to..... because each moment that i live, teaches me a lesson, signifiant one!! and what you gain from experience, you hardly ever wanna forget it..... or atleast its wise if you dont!!

sometimes i think it'd be awesome if i meet with an accident, injure my head, and forget the past forever, think it'd all be so easy and fresh..... but then when i try to imagine that happening to me, it shakes me to the core!! i know, even though i think i want, i never really want that to happen..... so what we are going through some rough times?? so what if we are heart broken?? i dont think it is worth giving up all the good memories..... which, even if i dont agree wit it, are much more than the sad memories that i've ever had..... and who says i will have a smooth life after that..... it might even be worse.....

today i was going to give up on someone, on something that is really beautiful, for a really wierd reason..... because i like to assume, and start believing those assumptions with all my heart!! but then, that one instant, that one moment, that one thought, forced me to change my mind..... that special someone, that special something, is definately a keeper, is definately worth the struggle, worth the momentary pain.....

thanks for being there..... dont ever wanna loose you..... wont make the same mistakes.....

coz five years down the line, when i look into the memory-lane, i dont want a tear in my eye and a regret in my heart..... i want a smile..... i want to appreciate the fact, that i took the right decision in that particular 'moment'.....

So i'm finally back after a really long time.... Not that I didn't want to write or something, just didn't have an access to the internet at the right time!!! A lot has happened in the past few months..... I am in college now..... Oh I'm doin B Arch(m in second year now!!).... don know for how long though!!! lol..... The place sucks big time.... Full of narrow minded poverts..... But then its the same everywhere rite?? (please say yes even if yu dont think so, it makes me feel a lil better!!!)

I have found a couple of good 'wierdoes' out here..... actually some really awesome friends..... got into lots of trouble with everyone and got smoothly out of them all..... if some day i feel like it, i cud even write a book about my experiences!!! fell in love with a beautiful person :) :D..... gained a lot[weight as well as a lil bit of knowledge ;)]......

spent some awesome time with my frens and family..... took vacations, some of which, i will mention, like my trip to kerela with my parents(bunked colg for 9 days... heehee), or Rewalsar with my bestiest buddies.... and some i wudn't like to mention(doesn't mean they weren't special.... those were few of the most beautiful days i've ever lived!!!)

dont think i have anything more to say rite now, but will b back with lots of pictures some time really soon..... till then, kudos.....
keep writing.....
:) :D ;) :P

Out Of Sheer Boredom

Its 1:30 in the morning and I'm awake (as usual) but this time it is because of a different reason. Its probably because all I did during the day was, NOTHING!! Yes, absolutely nothing! I just lay on my bed all day like a fruit on a fruit tray (though I'm quite sure i wont be eaten up!! lol). I'm sharing my 'new' room with my dad tonight and his snores are another reason why I'm writing this. Its almost a full moon and a clear sky outside. And, I'm writing in the moonlight(God save my eyes). I'm writing, not typing on my PC(well, i am now, but not at 1 in the morning). And I'm so bored that I'm giving such stupid details. All my friends have slept (apparently) and don't feel like switching on the PC this late, so don't know about my other nocturnal friends(read friend) lol!! And I know that you know that I'm talking about you.. :P... lol.. sorry!!

Ok, honestly, I cant think of anything I can write about. I was going through a friend's orkut profile today and among his favorite movies he had mentioned a movie named '10 Things I Hate About You'. I haven't seen the movie but the name just grabbed all my attention. There are times when you come across some thing and even if its of no importance at all, it gets registered in your mind. And this is something that has probably happened with me. I am quite happy, it has though. I mean I will write 10 things I don't like about a person, and will be able to get away with it, with no hard feelings(hopefully). lol..


So here are the 10 Things I Hate About 'You'

1> I hate it when you pull my cheeks and call me 'Rs 40 a Kg' lol, and run away, knowing I would never be able to catch you for a revenge!!

2> I hate it when you talk about me, with people you know i don't like to be discussed with. and make sure that I know you are talking about me!!

3> I hate the way you make those stupid noises while drinking coffee, tea, cold drinks etc... i feel like killing you at such times, you irritate me so much.

4> I hate it when you start digging your nose while thinking(well, i love clicking your pictures at such times and show it to everybody.. lol). And by the way, i have all of 'em saved.

5> I hate the way you ride your bike and drive your car,and almost hit me with it. I hate you for that one time you banged your bike into me!! I was on bed for a week!! You got to b more careful, after all I'm my parents only younger daughter!! lol...

6> I hate it when you get away with everything you do, with those stupid, funny faces you make, and everything comes on me!!

7> I hate the way you eat, dropping everything around, while watching those stupid sport channels (the cheer leaders actually :P)!

8> I hate the fact that you don't talk to me when you have taken me out for lunch and flirt around with every second girl you see. And when I talk to somebody(some guy), you give me that stupid deadly stare of yours, telling me that I'm not supposed to be doing that, even if that 'somebody' happens to be my friend. That is the only time you realize, you are here to talk with me, not the hundreds of those girl friends of yours!!

9> I hate it when you and your 'ex'(whom I don't know personally) call me at the same time(one on cell and the other on land line) describing the reason behind your latest fight. And giving me reasons(which of course I don't need) about how one cannot be friends with their exs'... And later again call me at the same time, telling me that you cant live without each other! Lord!! You are stupid!!

10> I hate you because I know you wont be reading this and even if you will, you wont be able to reply. I hate the very fact that you are not here with me, giving me all the more reasons to hate you!!


P.S. : Where ever you are, one thing that I want you to know is that I really miss you. I hate to admit it though!! :P

Hmmm......

Its 3:25 in the morning, and as usual I’m trying to sleep. Watching ‘Courage, the Cowardly Dog’ on Cartoon Network!! Though I’m really not sure if I’m watching it. Its almost a clear sky. Can see so many sparkling stars. Oh… those guys just made Courage the Sheriff. It’s a little cold, and I’m in my shorts and t-shirt, sitting on the clod stairs. Thinking, if I should really be thinking!!

I should have gone to DAV to get my pass certificate. Its been long, I haven’t talked to most or I shall say all of my friends!! Should have called them!! Why the hell is this site(orkut) not responding?? May be I have a reply. Reply, this late, I don’t think so!! But I’m worried. Should I really be worried?? I don’t think so. Some how I am.. hope you are fine!!

Sitting here I realize that I'm not me any more. but did I really wanted to change? No! I was so happy being me!! As Kody defines(even though he hardly knows me), a 'happy go lucky weirdo!!' lol. Weird, it really is. Just about a week back, I was some one else, and now!! I don't even know myself anymore. Angry, frustrated, don't feel like talking to any one, whining!! And I'm not liking it!!

Aah... its 3:35 now. Ed, Edd and Eddy. Never liked this cartoon much. Its strange, I'm sitting outside and watching TV through the window of our living room!! I dont feel like going inside to change the channel. Its so suffocating in there. i'm shivering now. I wonder if I'd be writting, how would my handwriting turn out?? I can hardly type!! Stupid thing to wonder about!! I think this entire post is stupid. And still, I dont stop typing. And I'm quite sure, I'd put up this post on my blog!! Another stupidity, but atleast I know I'm on my way to being my 'normal' self!!lol

'I'm in love with a stripper' (T Pain), the song's just ending. I really like its tune. Really melodious and sweet...

Aah... My favorite now - Behind blue eyes.. OK, I have to admit, cant take the cold anymore and I really need a hot cup of coffee. I think I'll move inside. I'll open the window beside the settee(where i sleep these days), in the living room!!

Almost 4 now, and I have my mug of black coffee with me. The stupid site is still not responding!! I'm quite snugly wrapped in my blanket. And still, soft chilly breeze is flowing through my window. Some lights just lit up on the hill across. I wonder what do people do waking up this early. And this is quite strange, because even I'm wide awake... What ever it is, I'm sure they wont be writing something this stupid!! Lol!!

I finally changed the channel. Its MTV now. Strange songs!! Most of 'em, I've never heard before!! Come to think of it. I switch on the TV either to watch cartoons or Discovery and stuff or HBO/Star movies... Did i hear 'how boring' ?? Lol!!

Bike, hmm... Thats what I want to do!! Go for a ride, some where far!! Or may be all I really need to do is, to talk to some one/ any one, face to face!! But then, I suck at it!! Some how I can't tell any one how I feel!!

I'd rather be cracking stupid, not at all funny jokes, and make fum of myself. lol!! May be that's why I'm writing!! But i still am not sure if I'm writing what I feel. Or is it just some stupid non-sense coming right out of my head!!

Star Movies, hmm.... Living with a stranger. I kind of like this movie. The sky is absolutely cloudy again. I think its going to start raining again any moment!! I wish it doesn't. I don't think my mum would approve of me dancing in the rain at 4:15 in the morning!! Gosh!! Its 4:15!! Even if I don't sleep at this time, I do lay down on the settee with the lights, TV and lappy switched off. The lights are switched off though!!

Its 4:30 now. The site is still encountering some problem. I'm feeling a bit hungry now. Strange, but true. May be I'd get some cornflakes for myself!!

I'm still watching the same movie. Its the second time I'm watching it. He's on his way back home from the hospital. He looks so confused. What if I forget everything someday?? How would I feel? SUFFOCATED!! More than now. All 'strange' people trying to tell me how they are related to me. Would I trust/believe 'em?? I wont have ny other choice! God knows why I'm thinking this!!

Its 4:42 now. A few more lights lit up. Sanjauli is still as brightly lit, as at 8 in the evening!! The hill looks really amazing. The mist, adds to its perfection...

Perfection, as Kenny calls it, an 'illusion' !! Probably, because we can never be satisfied with anything our entire life!! may it it is just 'engraved on our DNA'!! Lol... You can call me a copy cat for that!! We always want more and better!! Probably that is why, I would like to quote(some one), 'we end up screwing the most PERFECT moments'!! Lol...

Its 5 now. And I fee like dancing!! lol.. I know I'm crazy!! And should be 'locked up in a mental asylum', as some one says!! lol... The sky has started to light up, I can hear the first bird sing, sitting on the plum tree outside!! It looks beautiful... Beauty, a word that is so true and untrue at the same time.. surreal....

Aah.. My granpa just woke up. I'd better be going and makin some tea for him. Later, I think I would go for a long walk. Long walk with dear old Doodle. Gosh! He'll be turning 11 this august!! Don't know how I'll live in the hostel without him. I must stop now...

What else do I say....

P.S. : If any one really read this, I'm sorry for the crap..

OK, its six, and I'm back from the walk. I don't think I have much to say now... Except fr , it was really beautiful...

bye.. and thank you fr going through this post!! Do leave a comment if you read this!!

All Alone.....

Life’s so strange, one moment you are so happy that you don’t want anything else in life. You close your eyes with satisfaction, and the very next moment when you open them, everything’s gone.

You get addicted to the happiness. So much, that when it leaves you, it feels like your soul has left your body. Something pulls beneath the surface, gravity so high, feels like you are drowning in a swamp, never to emerge again. But still you live with the ashes of your sweet fairytale dreams.

The rain, falls like acid on my skin, burning my heart, killing me. The cool breeze reminds me of the time when you were there with me. You enveloped my body, protected me from every pain. And now I stand here all alone, my arms wrapped around my body. I shiver with cold, there's no one to comfort me.

The skies once so blue seem gloomy now. I lie down on the ground and look up, searching for your reflection. A smile lights up my face, I close my eyes with glee. But you’re gone again. I stand up, run around like crazy, looking for you. However, I find myself lonely as ever.

My eyes so dry, no tears left. Like you, they’ve abandoned me. Where do I go, what do I do, when will I find you, so many questions, but no answer. I lay on my bed all day long, thinking of you, dreaming of you.

Look how miserable have I gone! Like a jinxed zombie I move around. Everybody has deserted me, my smile, my happiness, my tears, and most important, YOU! No hope left in me. I just spend my life, each day, moving a little closer towards

my destination,
My grave.